So today was the last nail in the coffin that existed in the previous incarnation of El Jefe. This guy is oddly happy! Sure, my car is a wreck, Im jobless, and I would really dig to be a penniless sitar player. But you know, these things are not at the top of my worries list. What i am worried about is love. Isnt it funny? A new friend of mine is dissing me tonight, i wonder what i did? And i had yet another chat about how im dead inside. So i ask the main question, "How do you know if you are dead inside?" Well i know im dead inside because i cant feel those incredible highs i once felt as a young boy of 20. I find myself yearning for simpler days. Where crushes were crushes and you felt like you were flying through the air. What ever happened to those days? Am i bitter? Have i truly lost that sparkle i always prided myself on? Have i truly lost all the faith and hope in serendipity that I no longer can muster emotional responses? or are they a defense mechanism? can i replace the half dead? One only hopes... and in doing so, does that mean I do?
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