More hurdles, this 200m is turning into a 400!

i just spent the last 6 days in an orgy of alcohol and food. New York style pizza, roscoe burgers, tuna sandwiches, cosmos, blueberry lemon drops, champagne,tequila shots, and bacon cheddar burgers on sourdough! It all served to soothe my broken soul. But how do i move on? Previously, I realized that life is full of twists and turns and now it hit me! Damn you! So i didnt get the job that would have made my chaotic life a little less stressful. Now what do i do? where do i begin? What do i yearn for? I know what i love, but then to do that is quite another thing entirely. To become more in debt or try to claw my way out? And the damn enterprise people are taking forever to come pick me up! More to come, I feel love, I see love, but is my black deserted heart a barren wasteland without visitors?